omfg *DEPRESSION*


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+About Me+
Sex: F
Status: single! you interested?
Sign: Capricorn
B'Day: Jan.7.1987
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omfg *DEPRESSION*
11.09.04 (4:28 pm)   [edit]
omfg i'm so depressed. i'm not even in the mood to capitalize my words so just deal with it. i just want to crawl into bed and go to sleep for a looooooong time. i am just so fucking depresed and its making me sick. i can't take it anymore and i just don't know what to do.

*sigh*

i just give up. i can't win. so many things keep going wrong i just don't know how to deal anymore. i'm sorry for being such a failure at life, everyone. i just suck at it and thats how it is.

unnh i have so many stupid problems and i just don't see how to fix them. i've already blogged about most of them so i won't reiterate. one new thing tho that i've tried to refrain from bloggin about is my work life. i really didn't mind it at first besides the fact that its kinda boring sometimes ... but lately it really upsets me. i work for my dad as a secretary, but its another woman that tells me what to do. she was all nice and kewl at first ... ... however it seems the past .... 3 weeks maybe i suddenly can't do anything right and i'm a total failure at everything she assigns me to do. i don't understand. I'M SO SORRY I SUCK AT BEING SECRETARY. I'M SO FUCKING SORRY I'M NOT YOU AND I'M NOT PERFECT. i would quit if i gave up on things that easily and i didn't need the money and knew it wouldnt dissapoint my dad. *sigh* it seems like shes thinks of me as a slacker and that im taking advantage of my dad for this job. and it seems i can never redeem myself. its only 4 hours but those are the hardest and slowest 4 hrs to go through most of the time. i'm usually not home until 5.30 and then i have to eat dinner, take a shower and then find some time to do my homework. i really don't belong there ... i was organizing a company scrapbook today and found myself so entrothed in coloring, placing, arranging and captioning the scrapbook ... ... i actually felt happy and contented. yea i suck at being secretary. i dont answer phones right: im rude and unprofessional. i dont type labels right: they're off alignment by a quarter of an inch. i'm stupid because i didn't know the 'library' room had a name. im secretly trying to crash the network by fixing a computer, oh and i know little about them. and i'm cheating on my timesheets by eating lunch and working at the same time. and if anyone was dumb enough to take all that literally ... maybe they should just calmy close this window out and go read something straightforward and explicit. and this is in the event that this SOMEHOW gets back to the office and i'm called in to talk about 'how i feel' toward my job, my preformance and the unamed woman. my accounting teacher today mentioned to class about how accountants are anal-perfectionists (not in those words of course XD) and damn is it ever true in her case. but oh well. i hope none of you think i hate her ... because she has done nothing personal to me to make me feel that strongly about it. i just don't like working for her. and thats how i'm going to leave it. i'm not going to come on here and bitch about it, mud-sling and slander the situation because #1 it really makes the writer seem less intelligent and #2 a freak situation occurs, this makes it to her awareness and then i'm reprimanded for my 'mistake.' life is too damn difficult. and it sucls. and i suck at it. but theres nothing i can do but deal ... so i'm off to deal with my shitty life and finish my homework. hope y'all's day was atleast a little better than mine ... oyasu.
 


posted by: Jafo (reply)
post date: 11.09.04 (6:24 pm)

those people are the PERFECT people to pull pranks on!! rotten cheese in their lunch pails, whoopy cushions, stink pads under the desk, rubber animals in drawers, etc etc. you get the idea.

either way. tell that "PERSON" to back off or go find another person to do what you do!! (crazy, anal-retentive psycho peoples!!!) X)



posted by: stacey (reply)
post date: 11.10.04 (2:38 am)

lol dont answer phones huh??? lol i'd pick them up then scream down the phone then put it down again ^__^ she didnt say anythign about actually talking to the person on the otherside, right XD



posted by: mardigraslady (reply)
post date: 11.10.04 (5:02 am)

You are not alone in the way this person treats you. She does the same thing to the rest of us. Don't take it personally and don't worry about anything you say here getting back to anyone because I am the only on around here that knows your blog address and I consider us friends and what you say here stays here in my opinion. She is a control freak and if you don't do stuff her way it is wrong period. So like I said don't take it personally as hard as that might be.



posted by: deathangel (reply)
post date: 11.10.04 (2:26 pm)

Reply to: mardigraslady
Thanks that makes me feel alot better. I know you wouldn't say anything but odds are some freak thing would happen and someone else would stumble upon the url and what not. It'd be just my luck. T_T



posted by: deathangel (reply)
post date: 11.10.04 (2:27 pm)

Reply to: Jafo
HAhaha XD I'd never have the balls to do any of that stuff.



posted by: deathangel (reply)
post date: 11.10.04 (2:28 pm)

Reply to: stacey
Haha thats a good point! I'd prolly seem like I had Turrett Syndrome or something XD



posted by: kayoko (reply)
post date: 11.10.04 (4:53 pm)

*big hugs*

hope you have a better day tomorrow..and the day after

sometimes, i wonder if this depression thign is just...being a teen...and that i'll go away with time...



posted by: deathangel (reply)
post date: 11.10.04 (5:56 pm)

Reply to: kayoko
god i hope so ... damn hormones >.<



posted by: Jafo (reply)
post date: 11.10.04 (7:00 pm)

Reply to: deathangel
i'd certainly hope not!!!! X)



posted by: kayoko (reply)
post date: 11.11.04 (2:33 am)

Reply to: deathangel
how come jafo doesn't seem to have these problems?

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